want some advice, started seeing a chick. :-)

cooljules

Guest
Started seeing a girl a couple of weeks ago, its actually my first serious GF i ever had, when we were both teenagers. (not the first girl i had been with, had many before that, but we dated for a couple of years, then very bad breakup) i hadnt seen her or spoke for many years, but i was around her area so called at her parents...turned out she was living back there after a breakup. luckily her father didnt recognise me (he hated me when i was dating her at 15 lol).


anyway we get on soooooooooooooooooo well, she says i still act like i did at 18, same crap jokes, same crap one liners etc. and we both feel soooooooo at ease, no nerves or tension, it just feels right.

only trouble is, she has a good job, savings and own house etc, where as i have nowt. she says that doesnt bother her but im the type of person who checks prices on everything and worry about the last pound, where she doesnt.....

she knows about my bad back, the meds etc and how i struggle, and says it isnt a problem. but im finding it hard that, i dont have any money and she does, before my accident i was working, and now i just feel useless and a sponger.

we get on like a house on fire, the dogs really like her and vice versa. but am i worrying about nothing? do some girls not care that the man has no money...........

also its the first (well 2nd) time i have been with someone my own age(ish). all the other girls were 15/20 years younger than me. so thats taking some getting use too lol.

shes really nice, sweet and caring, and like i said, we get on well (i still have the ferarri poster and car she got me over 20 years ago which saw noticed on a tv show i was on)
 
cooljules said:
Started seeing a girl a couple of weeks ago, its actually my first serious GF i ever had, when we were both teenagers. (not the first girl i had been with, had many before that, but we dated for a couple of years, then very bad breakup) i hadnt seen her or spoke for many years, but i was around her area so called at her parents...turned out she was living back there after a breakup. luckily her father didnt recognise me (he hated me when i was dating her at 15 lol).


anyway we get on soooooooooooooooooo well, she says i still act like i did at 18, same crap jokes, same crap one liners etc. and we both feel soooooooo at ease, no nerves or tension, it just feels right.

only trouble is, she has a good job, savings and own house etc, where as i have nowt. she says that doesnt bother her but im the type of person who checks prices on everything and worry about the last pound, where she doesnt.....

she knows about my bad back, the meds etc and how i struggle, and says it isnt a problem. but im finding it hard that, i dont have any money and she does, before my accident i was working, and now i just feel useless and a sponger.

we get on like a house on fire, the dogs really like her and vice versa. but am i worrying about nothing? do some girls not care that the man has no money...........

also its the first (well 2nd) time i have been with someone my own age(ish). all the other girls were 15/20 years younger than me. so thats taking some getting use too lol.

shes really nice, sweet and caring, and like i said, we get on well (i still have the ferarri poster and car she got me over 20 years ago which saw noticed on a tv show i was on)
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Cooljules

Money is not every thing mate the young lady is not worried. Go for it you only live once no good later on saying i wish i done that.:have fun:
 
If she says it isn't a problem, then it isn't.

When I first met my now-husband, I had a good career, home etc while he had a struggling business hit badly by the 80's recession then faced homelessness and bankruptcy. He had the same worries you're now facing but it was never an issue to me and situations have since reversed. Companionship, mutual support and enjoying your time together are far more important and valuable than bank balances.
 
Very blunt, if she wants to be with you and you want to be with her, just do it. Life is too short. Happiness is what counts, not wealth. Good luck.
 
she hasnt seen me yet where my back is soooo bad i cant walk or literally do anything. shes ok when we go food shopping and i ask her to carry the bags if too heavy, so i carry the light ones. i dont mean shes mega rich, `but where like chalk and cheese, i count every penny as i have too, where she doesnt.

its like we are teenagers again and just so happy, but she knows how bad i feel about having no money. i was showing her how i run my camper on cooking oil to save money and she says she never thinks about how much it takes to fill a car. i guess it goes back to how i was brought up and how i was before my accident, guy pays for everything etc etc. (i still cant like a girl buy me a drink, no matter how skint i am lol)

must admit, last few weeks i have been very happy, been sooo low for a long time, but now i seem to smile more, even when by myself :)
 
cooljules said:
she hasnt seen me yet where my back is soooo bad i cant walk or literally do anything. shes ok when we go food shopping and i ask her to carry the bags if too heavy, so i carry the light ones. i dont mean shes mega rich, `but where like chalk and cheese, i count every penny as i have too, where she doesnt.

its like we are teenagers again and just so happy, but she knows how bad i feel about having no money. i was showing her how i run my camper on cooking oil to save money and she says she never thinks about how much it takes to fill a car. i guess it goes back to how i was brought up and how i was before my accident, guy pays for everything etc etc. (i still cant like a girl buy me a drink, no matter how skint i am lol)

must admit, last few weeks i have been very happy, been sooo low for a long time, but now i seem to smile more, even when by myself :)
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But how are you getting on with the van conversion? Does this romance mean the conversion is shelved? The van is your biggest priority CJ!


:lol-053:
 
You could always get her to finish the van of for you before you go of on your honey moon:lol-049::lol-049::lol-049::goodluck:
 
the van work has come to a standstill, i cant manage it by myself, my back wont let me, i do little bits but i then find i made a mess screwing and fitting things. i just want to get the cooking area and sofa/bed done soon, so i can go on the yorkshire meet end of next month. i have some hardboard to sturdy up the sides of the frame for the sink and cooker but i just cant cut it, the vibrations that go through my back are just too much. it hurts enough doing the bits i can lol

yes the camper is the most important thing, the dogs are missing there nights away and lots of places to run and explore.
 
I know the feeling about backs! I suffer with mine these days, did it in years ago chain sawing and never really recovered.

Getting old doesnt help, cant do the things I used to be able to on my own, bloody frustrating.

Good luck with the romance

Peter
 
Good luck joules money isnt everything but happiness is dont beat yourself up about it if she was that bothered she would of told you by now ,enjoy yourself and have a laugh what have you got to loose good on ya :drive: cheers john and shakey jakey
 
Get a good solicitor, draw up a legal document listing all your faults and imperfections and get her to sign where it says she doesn't mind (and don't forget to add a clause in the small print that says you get all she has in the event of a break-up). :lol-049:

Seriously - as others have said, life is too short and good partners/companions are hard to find so if you've found one, go for it.................... :goodluck:
 
ta everyone for the nice comments. it is really like we are teenagers again how we act. i still have a foto of her when she was almost 15, at my grandfathers retirment part in 89) and then she had the best legs in the world. we split up, as i wanted to wait until she was 16 for you know what, but in the mean time went out and cheated on her, and told her. so wasnt a good break up at all.

we just feel so at ease together, she doesnt care how my back affects me, er...you know what i mean, and what problems i have taking so many meds. we just each enjoy being with each other at the weekends. (her dad tried to ground her the other week lol, at the age of 36!!!)

my mates who have seen me recently, say i look much healthier etc. ok im pretty old at 40, but its nice to feel young at heart again, even if my body is way too old lol
 
shurup whingin ya great big puff, geron wi it and enjoy it, if she ses shes not bothered, then shes not bothered, if you go on about it she'll get fed up wi ya and bugger off, so just bloody accept thats how things are, you cant change it, you cant help who you fall for, remember, opposites attract, i mean, look at Henry and Squibby, lol, love at first bite, lol, no seriously CJ, just chillax
 
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Want some advice

No sweetheart, van is not the most important. Van will allways be there, lovely girl may not. Sieze the moment, life is short, (Tiger Balm is great for massaging bad backs)
 
cooljules said:
Started seeing a girl a couple of weeks ago, its actually my first serious GF i ever had, when we were both teenagers. (not the first girl i had been with, had many before that, but we dated for a couple of years, then very bad breakup) i hadnt seen her or spoke for many years, but i was around her area so called at her parents...turned out she was living back there after a breakup. luckily her father didnt recognise me (he hated me when i was dating her at 15 lol).


anyway we get on soooooooooooooooooo well, she says i still act like i did at 18, same crap jokes, same crap one liners etc. and we both feel soooooooo at ease, no nerves or tension, it just feels right.

only trouble is, she has a good job, savings and own house etc, where as i have nowt. she says that doesnt bother her but im the type of person who checks prices on everything and worry about the last pound, where she doesnt.....

she knows about my bad back, the meds etc and how i struggle, and says it isnt a problem. but im finding it hard that, i dont have any money and she does, before my accident i was working, and now i just feel useless and a sponger.

we get on like a house on fire, the dogs really like her and vice versa. but am i worrying about nothing? do some girls not care that the man has no money...........

also its the first (well 2nd) time i have been with someone my own age(ish). all the other girls were 15/20 years younger than me. so thats taking some getting use too lol.

shes really nice, sweet and caring, and like i said, we get on well (i still have the ferarri poster and car she got me over 20 years ago which saw noticed on a tv show i was on)
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My advice is to tell her that you have no idea who or what wildcaming forum is all about, you have never heard of it, haven't a clue what or who is on there. This should do the job, she will love you for who you are, not what you're worth!:heart::shag:
 
shes says shes happy with me for who i am, inc no money and bad back. i cooked a sunday dinner, which totally hurt so she did the pots, she says thats fine, as long as im not lazy, when my backs ok, and i do what i can. which seems fair enough. shes had very bad flu all week and wish she was here so i could look after her (and make sure she eats, shes a good liar about eating when she hasnt!!!!)

its really just been me and the dog for the past 16 years, girls seem to have come and gone, ok i know its not easy to be with someone with a damaged back, esp when the weather is cold and damp, heard it so many times that it was ok, yet they sort of buggered off (i know not all of them due to that though) shes never been married or had kids and she said to me other day, she never wanted to with anyone before, but with me, she could see that if we are still together in the near future, it sounded daft, but were so at ease, we argue, i want to watch match of the day (she forget i used to like footie in the olden days) and expect ups and downs.

but as jenny said (wow she actually said something that makes sense) if i keep thinking lack of money is a problem, it will drive her away.......

if i can get my van ready for the yorks meet at end of dec, and she can get a day or 2 off she wants to go with me and the pooches. :)

im not not much different in age to her how old her dad was then that i am now.........and can see why i wouldnt have let someone like me be with his 15 year old daughter hehe. no i wasnt that bad really.

im just taking each day at a time.
 
munkins said:
No sweetheart, van is not the most important. Van will allways be there, lovely girl may not. Sieze the moment, life is short, (Tiger Balm is great for massaging bad backs)
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No way! Van is the most important...:mad1:...plenty of fish in the sea when you feel like fishing...If she has no DIY skills find another fish...(a heat gun is great for restoring plastic trim like new)

:lol-049:



And they called it puppy loooooovve...
 
I agree with the others. Life's too short just get on with it and enjoy yourselves. If she wanted someone with money she would have gone with someone with money. not all women are materialistic! (honest!)
 
Not that you need my opinion but ---
Just take it easy, take it a day at a time. What will be, will be, it's no use fretting about the future. Enjoy the time you are spending with this girl as if each day were your last and there was no tomorrow. Then things will probably turn out really well. Good luck!
 
Teffy said:
Not that you need my opinion but ---
Just take it easy, take it a day at a time. What will be, will be, it's no use fretting about the future. Enjoy the time you are spending with this girl as if each day were your last and there was no tomorrow. Then things will probably turn out really well. Good luck!
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awwwwww what a lovely message,
 
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