The long awaited Numpty Club FREE membership

delicagirl

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Maybe we could have a vote in a few weeks as to who was/is the biggest numpty ?


I'll kick off... getting my van ready last week for the long summer outing and could not work out why the water pump for the main tank was not making a noise - no water coming out of the taps either .... secondary water reservoir with second water pump working Ok ......

mmm

beggar.... cant go off for months with only a few liters of water ....



thinks.............



NUMPTY I'd got no flaming water in the tank cos I drained the system down in January
 
I drove off and left my door mat in Spain,also there's a collection of dog toys and balls left in random laybys across southern Europe.
 
I drove to the top of a mountain in Spain, I needed a number 2, after miles and miles finally a lay by came along only to find the cassette was jammed, quickly I slipped out the old cassette and put the empty one in, RELIEF, now what's wrong with the original cassette, using a screwdriver I managed to lever open the flap that was protecting me from atmospheric pressured shite, face, hair, tshirt, glasses all went in the shower to get rid of the smell😀😀😀😀👍👍👍👍, Nearly got divorced that day if only Janet had stopped laughing for me to be angry, andy
 
andyjanet said:
I drove to the top of a mountain in Spain, I needed a number 2, after miles and miles finally a lay by came along only to find the cassette was jammed, quickly I slipped out the old cassette and put the empty one in, RELIEF, now what's wrong with the original cassette, using a screwdriver I managed to lever open the flap that was protecting me from atmospheric pressured shite, face, hair, tshirt, glasses all went in the shower to get rid of the smell😀😀😀😀👍👍👍👍, Nearly got divorced that day if only Janet had stopped laughing for me to be angry, andy
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:raofl::raofl::raofl::raofl::raofl::wave:


you must have discovered that its impossible to adopt the stern-faced moral high ground when covered in effluent !!!!!
 
A couple of years ago whilst digging in Orkney I was wild camping over the weekend, sunday night and I was getting my work clothes ready for the next day.....NO BOOTS crumbs! where had I left them? eventually located them in the car park where I have left them on the Friday night!

Its not everywhere you can leave a pair of boots and a bag of archaelogical kit for two days and them still be there when you get back!
 
No! Don't beat yourself up, Collette:cry: it happens to people of our youth! 😞
Did a similar thing:scared:, forgot to switch on the 12volt system! 😭
 
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Izzy and I looked after a fellow members flat and cats in London for 3 months. One evening we went into the City, St. Paul's was lit up and looked really stunning. To get a good photo we entered a restaurant opposite, it had an upper terrace, perfect for 'the shot'. Took a few pics on the mobile from different angles, then decided to do a selfie with St. Paul's as a backdrop. Every pic looked like it was taken in thick smog and were really dark. About the sixth attempt, I get a tap on the shoulder and this young city type said "try turning your mobile around then you won't be taking pictures of the sky!

Selfie virgins no more!;)
 
Stopped on southbound Tebay services for a break and to let our Golden Retriever have a toilet stop. The electric step wasn't working so we were using a pair of Aldi metal steps. Anyway dog satisfied myself and wife got seated and belted and set off south only to realise about 20 miles down the motorway that we had left the steps behind, I must admit this wasn't the first time. I've since fixed the electric step so hopefully no repeat of this error.
 
I nominate me :wave:

Mainly for letting the nob head service manager at
Cahors Peugeot reverse my motorhome into their workshop today and straight into one of the cast iron support girders :mad2:

It's all fixed and looks better than it did before that's
not the point :mad2:
 
I'd definitely have to join,whenever I'm on a site and plugged in I go to switch fridge to electric and nothing happens...strange me thinks.... Then try heater... Light comes on then goes off....After much head scratching and checking fueses cables I even try unplugging and using another bolard socket,it usually takes an hour then I remember the isolater switches..😂.. Every time..... And don't get me started on the hob glass lid... It has to be fully up to work... Not very nearly up, I had it in bits till I realised,nearly had to have cold soup... Mark
 
1st Motorhome 2nd trip at Dunnet bay campsite. Old thing had rear stabilisers. Nearly drove off 'n' all with 'em down but a guy came running waving his arms and very apologetically told us. He was a bit hesitant in case they came up automatically. They didn't and that would have been an interesting one 2 drive off and still look cool !
 
Pulled into services on the m1 lorry park was really busy so tucked into a corner out the way had a cup of tea thought we would get our heads down for half an hour thinking noise of the lorries would wakes us
1 hour 50mins later woke up to find lorry park empty caravans motorhomes all gone did the quickes exit of services didn't get time to put cups away cleared up on the way.
 
We were at a French motorway `peage`, and I was getting in a right two and eight cos I was having a problem paying with my plastic. Eventually, as the queue behind us stretched off into the distance, a disembodied voice said a few words from the machine (in French obviously). Now, my French is rusty by about 40 years, and by this time I was practically catatonic. I meant to reply `Do you speak English?`, but instead my brain could only rustle up two words: `Speak English!!`

He hung up.
Entente cordiale anyone?
 
My favorite trick is to spend ages running hot tap to bleed air out only to remember the dump valve is open, once might not get membership of 'numpty club', but the number of times I've done it must make me a life time gold member.
 
hungry numpty

Pride of place me get loads of brownie points ,wash all the dishes and pans ,then drove off and left them ,cost a bloody fortune in meals till we got home !!
:lol-053:
 
LOL.. Recheck......

Ok this has got be classed as a total numpty although the wife called me something else which maybe shouldn't be put here lol......

So we're all excited and ready for a trip down south. All packed up into the van, then a quick double take to make sure we have everything. Yep all good.. So into reverse to pull off the drive.. Quick glance back at the house, only to find one of our young boys at the porch window, red faced and crying out " DON'T LEAVE ME" poor little bugger was so upset.. :(

Thing is he'd already been in the van waiting getting all excited. I hadn't notice that he'd popped back in to go to the loo.... Funny thing is that his older brother never said anything either..

Lesson learnt. (always leave the drive quicker and dont look back lol lol lol) jokeing!!!!
 
yorkshireCPLE said:
Ok this has got be classed as a total numpty although the wife called me something else which maybe shouldn't be put here lol......

So we're all excited and ready for a trip down south. All packed up into the van, then a quick double take to make sure we have everything. Yep all good.. So into reverse to pull off the drive.. Quick glance back at the house, only to find one of our young boys at the porch window, red faced and crying out " DON'T LEAVE ME" poor little bugger was so upset.. :(

Thing is he'd already been in the van waiting getting all excited. I hadn't notice that he'd popped back in to go to the loo.... Funny thing is that his older brother never said anything either..

Lesson learnt. (always leave the drive quicker and dont look back lol lol lol) jokeing!!!!
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LOL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i spilt my coffee......


if there is an award for the BEST NUMPTY - this , in my humble view, will be the winner up to now !! Presumably you will never be allowed to forget this EVER !!!
 
delicagirl said:
LOL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i spilt my coffee......


if there is an award for the BEST NUMPTY - this , in my humble view, will be the winner up to now !! Presumably you will never be allowed to forget this EVER !!!
Click to expand...


LOL correct. Even to this day he says, "yes dad I'm in" he's 19 now..
 
There's just been so many over the years:

Halfway up the M6 discovered the kids' bags of clothes had been left behind.

Filling up water without closing the dump tap so it's going out as fast as it's going in.

Leaving the waste tap open all weekend and only realising when I went to the service point to dump (that was 4 weeks ago).

Driving off with corner steadies down. The rooflights were open as well, but I noticed that further on.

Not closing the kitchen window properly - it blew off somewhere along the A50.

Turning on the empty gas bottle instead of the full one.

Have left many dogs' screws and leads behind. Also mats and steps.

I could go on...................
 
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