On your own

wanderlust

Guest
Looking for advice.
We sold our caravan in the summer and my husband passed away. I am in my forties and have always wanted freedom of a campervan and we had planned to do it together
I know I now want to live and enjoy life and do this but I felt protected with him and wouldn't enjoy it on my own.
Just wondering what others do in this position
 
There are several women members on this site who do not have partners, they still travel and get about in there Motorhomes and Campervans and I am sure will at some point be replying to your thread. Life is too short to not do the things you want to do - read some of the threads about travelling, read the magazines and again read threads to see what sort of vehicle you would be happy with and do it. I hope you get the replies that will help and hope in the future to maybe meet with you at one of the gatherings. :goodluck: :wave:
 
Hi and welcome to the site.
Quite a few on here go solo both male and female. I continued to go away after my marriage ended. It can get a bit quiet though you'll meet peeps when out and about. I'm actually quite enjoying the ability to do what i want and when I want. I and others find a pet or two helps. Not just dogs but cats. rabbits and others. There are also meets every so often at different parts of the UK.
 
I'm long term single and wild camp a lot on my own although I do have 2 dogs with me, and to be honest, I'm not sure if I would do it without the dogs.

I do get very anxious about things sometimes, but usually it's more about mechanical problems than about where I'm staying, usually because I'm totally skint and mechanical problems are really stressful because I know it's going to take £££ to sort them out. So I make sure I've got full breakdown cover (which I've never needed but it relieves my anxiety to know that I can get off the motorway and either back home or to a garage or to my destination safely).

On the odd occasion when I have been aware of noises outside during the night, I just double check that all my doors are locked, curtains drawn and stay put, knowing that I'm pretty safe inside a metal van. I always make sure that my mobile is charged or on charge when going to bed and that I know exactly where I am and could give the exact details to emergency services if necessary.

But I've honestly never had any problems. Having the dogs puts my mind at rest but there are some forum members who carry dog bowls and dog leads to leave outside the van to give the impression that there are dogs inside the van.

And if you read my blog post, The first year with the BWV, you'll see that although I've been alone, I've had some wonderful times in my van and perhaps being alone has made them more special. And you do get a huge sense of self-satisfaction and achievement from doing something out of the ordinary and coping with problems on your own.

There are, as said above, quite a few singleton women on the forum of a similar age and it's been good for some of us to meet up sometimes to chat about experiences, concerns, good ideas etc. And you'll get so much help and support and advice from people on here, that when you do eventually manage to meet up with some of them, it feels like meeting up with old friends.

My van and this forum have been life changing for me in many ways over the past 2 years, and I've done things that I hadn't done for 20 odd years and thought I'd never do again, and I've done new things, and learned new skills etc. I'd now rather lose my house than my van and couldn't bear the thought of losing the freedom that the van has given me.
 
Have a look on the dailymail online page for today there is a lady on there who bought a motorhome with her husband a few years ago to cancer before He died he persuaded her to carry on with their dream sounds as though she is doing well,
Sorry tried to do a link but crap at it story titled my Odysseus of love in a motorhome
 
Only you know the answer, but I might be inclined to stick his pic in the van & take him the places you always wanted to go.
 
Give it a try. If it doesn't suit put it down to experience.
This forum is full of supportive people, both online and in person.
If you don't give it a whirl, you will forever be wondering.

I for one would recommend a dog for both company and security. I am lucky as I also have a 6 foot plus builder bloke as well. Don't tell him he comes second to the dog.:goodluck:
 
You can always join the AA if you are worried about the MH and breakdowns. There are a number of young ladies on here who are out and about and we have seen a few at the wheel of a camper. Just be careful and don't park up anywhere remote or you will never get to sleep. Some of the pub stops are really good we stopped at Caister over the New Year. Pool, Gym etc. Know it would be different on your own but maybe a dog would be company. Meg sleeps in the front foot well. She is a Labrador cross with a miniature poodle so doesn't take up a lot of room. As others have said there are group meetings but the one we went to started at 10am with home brew vodka and went on to the early hours of the following day .....

Some did look a bit sick the following day ....
 
wanderlust said:
Looking for advice.
We sold our caravan in the summer and my husband passed away. I am in my forties and have always wanted freedom of a campervan and we had planned to do it together
I know I now want to live and enjoy life and do this but I felt protected with him and wouldn't enjoy it on my own.
Just wondering what others do in this position
Click to expand...


It would probably be a good idea to join the Motorcaravanners club, we have been members for a long time.

There you can enjoy meetings & soscial events in the company of others to help you feel more secure.

They are many single ladies as members, who like you, find themselves alone, but wish to carry on travelling.

Just a thought.

Dezi
 
Go for it!!!

wanderlust said:
Looking for advice.
We sold our caravan in the summer and my husband passed away. I am in my forties and have always wanted freedom of a campervan and we had planned to do it together
I know I now want to live and enjoy life and do this but I felt protected with him and wouldn't enjoy it on my own.
Just wondering what others do in this position
Click to expand...

I travel by myself in Europe and have many ladies who travel by themselves and not one of them have had any bad experiences I would suggest having a dog which does deter and are great company for you. Hope have a great time:eek:
 
Hi there. I travelled with my partner for many years before he died. I couldn't even go in our van after he died and gave it to my daughter. About 5 years later my friend bought a van and I thought yes, I can do it alone too. I bought a van and it has been fantastic though emotionally difficult at first. Last September I went to France by myself. I felt really empowered. I'm a bit of a wimp so if I can do it, I'll bet you can. You'll get so much support from this and other forums. If you want to pm me please do. :eek:
 
Hi Wanderlust,

We need more members like you that just want to get on and enjoy life, no matter what it throws at us. Well done and good luck to you!

One piece of advise. You do need something to occupy yourself when you are feeling a little down and the weather is cr*p. Some mention a dog as company but I prefer the radio. Less walking, feeding and clearing up after. My Tablet with Kindle on it is a great help. Does not matter what it is as long as you can curl up in the warm and indulge in a bit of self pity for a while. Might even put a smile back on your face.

Richard
 
Sorry to read of the loss of your husband but I hope this won't deter you from camping.

I'm a solo female (40's) wildcamper and have solo wildcamped throughout the UK from Lands End to John o'Groats. I enjoy being alone and able to travel at my own pace and have been doing so since my 20's and solo youth hostelling in my teens.

During these 20+ years of camping about 70 nights per year, I have only ever encountered problems once and this was at Nash Point near Llantwit Major despite camping camped there several times previously. I learned from this - never park at the foot of a remote, dark lane from which there is no exit. I had to request police assistance and it's reassuring to know that they're there to help if needed. This was a one-off situation but providing you choose your spot carefully, as I normally do, park facing forwards so you can drive away if you need to and ensure you're not in a position where you can become trapped (as I was) then really it is very safe and very easy. Sometimes I also think it's even easier if you're female because local villagers sometimes keep an eye on you and possibly see you as less of a perceived 'threat' than if you're male.

I don't have a dog but have sometimes camped with a French Lop or Giant rabbit!

Happy camping!
 
Hi Wanderlust

wanted to reiterate what people have said about go for it - I am on my own,early 60's, got my first ever van a couple of years and headed off to europe with my dog for company - have never had any problems, dont wild camp very much because I have a rock and roll bed so would need about 15 mins to get myself sorted but have stayed on lots of aires and by restaurants - and probably a huge sin to admit to - on campsites but the laidback scruffy ones - no strimmers for me please! My dog has not only been great company, and security he is also a great way to start conversations- even when I couldnt speak the language I would be communicating over him.

So my advice is go for it -the only thing to fear is fear itself. In all the months I have travelled I have never met anything except kindness and a willlingness to help whether it be from other mhomers or just people I have met- a big smile and just ask and people will help.

Have lots of fun - you wont regret it.
J
 
User1 said:
You can always join the AA if you are worried about the MH and breakdowns. There are a number of young ladies on here who are out and about and we have seen a few at the wheel of a camper. Just be careful and don't park up anywhere remote or you will never get to sleep. Some of the pub stops are really good we stopped at Caister over the New Year. Pool, Gym etc. Know it would be different on your own but maybe a dog would be company. Meg sleeps in the front foot well. She is a Labrador cross with a miniature poodle so doesn't take up a lot of room. As others have said there are group meetings but the one we went to started at 10am with home brew vodka and went on to the early hours of the following day .....

Some did look a bit sick the following day ....
Click to expand...

I have to completely disagree with the advice about avoiding remote places. They are far and away the safest and quietest locations and I invariably sleep easiest there. Up in the mountains and forests, buy a lake or river or on a lonely beach miles from anywhere if I can.

Staying near other vans can attract idiots. Places near centres of population are often the haunts of doggers or kids doing donuts in hot hatchbacks. The constant comings and goings will have you a gibbering wreck. This is one reason why I probably wouldn't bother with any of the promenade stop-overs, just too many drunks wandering around late at night who might decide it is funny to rock the van or kick it. But, as others say later, our own fear is usually the biggest problem in reality. In Spain, the thieves often appear to target congregations of motorhomes if you read some of the accounts of problems posted on threads here.

Popular dog walking spots can be good as they tend to keep the idiots away and yet they are mostly only around in the morning and evening.
 
Hi Wanderlust, :welcome:

Sorry for your loss, like Runnach I think hiring would be advisable before jumping in at the deep end. As you have caravanned you appreciate the lifestyle but a Camper / Motorhome is quite different to a caravan and you may not like the differences so best to try before you part with your hard earned. I would suggest watching the forum for the next solo's meet and try to hire and attend the meet, you will learn an amazing amount by meeting like minded folks who will be falling over them selves to help.
You might also go to an outdoor show / National show to look at Vans to get a feel for what layout and size of van you might like, the advantage of the shows is there is less likelyhood of sales pressure whilst you view.
You have had some great advice already but you will probably need to work up to wilding gradually, Vespalian is right the more remote places are generally the best but you need to feel comfortable about going solo before going "wild" solo.

Good luck and enjoy.

Clive
 
Lots of solo Ladies out in Caravans Tents and Motorhomes,so you would soon meet like minded people.I recomend that you join the Camping and Caravan Club who have a Companions section,not a dating group or anything like that but just people who are single for whatever reason.This way you will get lots of help and encouragement on the field and company untill you are ready to go out wild on your own,very good luck to you.
 
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