I'll be going, just to prove to myself that I can go to a show WITHOUT buying yet another motorhome.
I want to talk to the Thetford people about my cassette and how to make a powered ventilator for it - I think the basic plastic mouldings are there but as it has an over-pressure vent, is that extendable to make it a permanent vent, and can they be added to with tubing, fan, timer to make a proper vent as I had on my Hobby?
Also to get an
insurance quote from C&CC with free coffee and a sit down, but mainly to look at lots of shiny new models, hold my chest out and head high, walk away from them and say "Don't want it - Had one of those - That's rubbish - How do you expect anyone to stand up in that? - How can I have a wash in a 3/4 inch deep washroom sink? - Why does the sink make all the water from the tap go immediately down the drain - how many camp sites have hot and cold water plumbed directly to each pitch? - How can a child operate the ceiling light when they want to go to the toilet at night? - You surely don't expect me to climb an aluminium ladder in my bare feet to get in and out of bed do you? - do you really expect that to last a year and a day before I put in a warranty claim? (to mr Autosleeper)_- Do you want to hear why I will never buy anything else from you Mr Brownhills? - Is that all you'll give me for my part exchange? You're 'avin-a-laff aint you? - Why has that 3500kg camper got a payload of 150kg when it has four seat belts? - when are you going to employ a competent electical company? (again to Mr Autosleeper) - have you ever actually used a motorhome or were you selling snow to eskimos last week? - No I'm not taking out a loan for that, if I haven't got the cash I can't afford it.
And if there is a dealer from Germany, or France, I will ask them in all seriousness if they are a Mercedes franchise, what their labour charges are. I have an exceedingly strong suspicion that the commercial MB dealer in France where I had some work done last year was charging half the labour rate that my nearby one in England does. That would definitely make it cheaper to pay the ferry fee and have servicing work done over there. And if MB themselves have a stand, as do Fiat, then I want to ask why my Sprinter has handbrake cables going to the rear brake hubs, but it has electric parking brakes. The cables run from the hubs forwards to the centre of the chassis half way along the wheelbase, and there they stop. They are not attached to anything except a terminating block. There is no handbrake lever in the cab. So why on earth are there handbrake cables? Can I just chop them off and increase the payload? I'll take my invoice for the Sprinter work I had done and ask Mr Mercedes if it is normal on the continent for them to charge different labour rates for different skills. The invoice shows various different labour rates for - set up the van for testing, do the testing, diagnose the fault, dismantle the dashboard, fit the new parts, reassemble the dashboard, carry out tests and so on. These labour rates varied from €70 per hour for unskilled work to €110 per hour for the specialised work. And they only charged for the hours they worked, not some fancy book time that is twice what it actually takes to do the job. Compare that with the flat rate of £168 per hour that my local commercial dealer quoted me.
I will rapidly bypass the superdooper cheese cutting knives, and the cheese stalls, the magnetic bracelets, the glamping sites, the climbing wall, the 'I've never heard of them' celebrities, the £15 beefburger food Dick Turpin-for-a-boss places, the wheelchair vendors (but make a quiet mental note that they are there, for future reference), the doggy bag vendors 'cos I haven't got a dog, the tent campings 'cos I gave up being cold, wet and sore from sleeping on the ground many years ago. And of course the caravans because fundamentally whether or not you like or hate towing, having a caravan means that you are compelled to use a camp site. Bleurrgh. I'm not paying someone £25 a night just to park on their grass if I can possibly avoid it.
I will come away having had a satisfying day thinking of all the scores of thousands of pounds (hundreds of thousands of pounds? ) I have saved by not buying a new camper, and perhaps most of all got away from the cold, miserable weather outside, into a brightly lit holiday environment full of promise of warm sunshine in beautiful countries south of the channel. Or maybe east, who knows?
ccmshow.co.uk
