fairytooth
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1. Did you hear about the fat, alcoholic transvestite - All he wanted to do was eat, drink and be Mary.
2. Got an e-mail today from a bored local housewife, 43, who was looking for some hot action!
So I sent her my ironing. That'll keep her busy.
3. I got invited to a party and was told to dress to kill. Apparently a beard and a backpack
wasn't what they had in mind.
4. After a night of drink, drugs and wild sex Bill woke up to find him self next to a really ugly woman.
That's when he realised he had made it home safely.
5. My mate just hired an Eastern European cleaner, took her 5 hours to hoover the house. Turns out she was a Slovak.
6. I've been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper. To be honest I only intended to rough him up a bit.
7. After years of research, scientists have discovered what makes women happy. Nothing.
8. A lad comes home from school and excitedly tells his dad that he had a part in the school play and he was playing a man who had been married for 25 years. The dad says, "Never mind son, maybe next year you'll get a speaking part."
2. Got an e-mail today from a bored local housewife, 43, who was looking for some hot action!
So I sent her my ironing. That'll keep her busy.
3. I got invited to a party and was told to dress to kill. Apparently a beard and a backpack
wasn't what they had in mind.
4. After a night of drink, drugs and wild sex Bill woke up to find him self next to a really ugly woman.
That's when he realised he had made it home safely.
5. My mate just hired an Eastern European cleaner, took her 5 hours to hoover the house. Turns out she was a Slovak.
6. I've been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper. To be honest I only intended to rough him up a bit.
7. After years of research, scientists have discovered what makes women happy. Nothing.
8. A lad comes home from school and excitedly tells his dad that he had a part in the school play and he was playing a man who had been married for 25 years. The dad says, "Never mind son, maybe next year you'll get a speaking part."